Asshole Drinking Game

Asshole Drinking Game
Asshole Drinking Game

Got a deck of cards? Let’s play the asshole drinking game. This is game is best with at least five players to truly enjoy it. By the end of each game, there will be 1 president, 1 vice president and 1 unfortunate asshole; while everyone else remains themselves lol.

Start by an even number of cards to each player; typically 6-7 cards per player. This is a dynamic number in that it can be higher or lower, your choice. Important note: 2 is the power card in Asshole. Weird? I know. The order of power is 2->A->K->Q->J->10->…..->3. To start, someone.. anyone plays a card then someone else plays. This someone else can either play a card higher than the previous card or pass. This continues until all players pass or a 2 is played. The 2, being the most powerful card ends that round and a new round is then started by the person who played the 2. Similarly, if everyone passes, the last person to play a card starts the new round. Sidenote: if a player has 2+ of the same cards, he may play them all, now changing up the round where everyone following him must also play the same number of cards while maintaining the order of power of the cards. Once again, 2 is the power card and the only way to stop this from continuing.

This asshole drinking game continues until each player has rid themselves of all their cards. The first participant to have an empty hand is dubbed the President, the second participant dubbed the VP while the remaining players are just normal citizens.. workers.. whatever. Except the asshole, the asshole is the last person in the game.

Now here’s the fun part of the asshole drinking game:

  • The President is the shit until another game is completed. He can make anyone drink at any time and he is allowed to start the upcoming games and every round in it. He should be treated like a king. You should aspire to be president obviously.
  • The VP is right under the president. He can make anyone below him drink; meaning anyone but the president.
  • The normal player hierarchy is in the order which players got out of the game; so the first player out can tell the second player out to drink etc.
  • By now you should see why the asshole is the asshole; he’s at the bottom of the food chain taking orders from everyone 🙁 He also does the grunt work such as dealing of the cards, and naturally he plays last because the rounds of the new game are played in the order of the hierarchy.

Enjoy the asshole drinking game! Don’t be afraid to be a jerk, especially if you are the president but don’t forget, karma’s a bitch!